Although sometimes intimidating, it is crucial that individuals are able to advocate for themselves in the workplace. Facing the undue challenge of sexism in the workplace is a delicate and daunting subject.
Making sure each member's voice is heard and valued should be at the forefront of each manager's priorities. However, many individuals are subject to unconscious or subconscious bias against others, meaning that they do not realize the inappropriate nature of their behavior, tone, actions, or attitude so, bringing it to their attention is a sensitive subject. The subconscious or unconscious intent of sexist behavior does not make it permissible but, it does create a learning opportunity. How can individuals address these concerns with their superiors without jeopardizing their relationship and impression or creating a workplace adversary?
Consider Tom, who is the Chief Marketing Officer of a small consulting firm. Tom is in his early 40s and has three young children at home. Tom's colleague, Jennifer is the Chief Technology Officer of this firm, also in her early 40’s with young children. In a recent meeting, executive leaders of the firm were discussing how to streamline some processes within the office using new technology. Jennifer suggests implementing Microsoft Teams within the office rather than strictly using email. Tom responds by sharing that most people would rather “stick to what they know” and use email. The conversation continues, and several other executive members agree with Tom. Eventually, Christopher, the company's Chief Information Officer chimes in sharing that Teams is a good idea because “it will make communication faster.” Other members begin to agree with Christopher and the meeting concludes with all members in favor of implementing Microsoft Teams, crediting Christopher for the great idea. Jennifer is left feeling unvalued by the team for her contributions because when she suggested implementing Teams, her idea was shot down, despite her industry knowledge, years of experience, and background data.
How can Jennifer approach Tom and other executives regarding the sexism she is facing in the workplace? How can leaders curb unconscious or subconscious biases that may affect them?
Jennifer is now tasked with approaching board leaders to express the discrimination she has been facing and find a remedy. However, Jennifer is concerned that approaching Tom or other executives may affect her reputation and relationships around the office. Jennifer needs to find a method of advocating for herself without negatively impacting her office status or alienating herself from her colleagues. Jennifer has a couple of approaches she could consider:
Point Out Sexist Behaviors In Meetings
Jennifer could stop the meeting at the point of inappropriate behavior and call out the group as a whole. In this situation, Jennifer does not assign blame to any one individual but to the group as a whole for undesirable practices. This is a good strategy because Jennifer does not single out one person but points out poor group norms for the whole team.
Confront Tom in the Meeting
Alternatively, Jennifer could first call out Tom for his poor behavior, accusing him of shooting down her idea without proper consideration. This strategy is a risky approach because Jennifer would be singling out Tom in front of others, likely making him upset and defensive. This strategy could be detrimental to Jennifers' reputation and professionalism in the office.
Speak Privately to Tom
Jennifer could speak directly to the instigator of this conversation, Tom, and point out his inappropriate behavior. In this meeting, Jennifer has to be direct and confront Tom in order to advocate for herself. Jennifer must carefully prepare for Tom’s reaction and be ready to continue a conversation if Tom is dismissive, defensive, or rude.
Speak Directly to Company HR
Jennifer could avoid confrontation with any specific individual and instead bring the topic to the company's Human Resources department. A representative from HR will be a great listener and could help guide Jennifer moving forward to navigate these challenges. HR may be able to speak to the other executives on Jennifers' behalf but, there is little follow-up or enforcement when a reprimanding comes from an “anonymous” source.
While these are some options for Jennifer, there is not always a “right answer” to approaching situations like this. Role dynamics, personality types, and workplace norms heavily impact the best route for dealing with discriminatory or offensive colleagues. In any situation relating to these concerns, it is crucial to remember these 4 tips:
- Plan Ahead
In entering a “crucial conversation,” it is important to be prepared to be clear and collected during a meeting. When discussing a threatening or upsetting scenario, many individuals may be taken aback by emotions or feelings clouding their communication methods. If individuals prepare in advance with written points, feelings, and experiences, they are better able to stay on track and remember the points they were considering when the scenario took place. Additionally, in planning ahead individuals should prepare for the different outcomes possible in a confrontation. For example, individuals may become defensive or disagreeable and derail the important conversation.
2. Choose the Right Time and Place
In protecting an individual's own professional impressions and relationships, it is crucial to select the correct time and place. In private, many individuals will be more calm and willing to discuss because their reputation is not at risk in front of others. Individuals are more willing to apologize and accept their faults without public embarrassment or accusations.
3. Be Specific
Clearly explain the comment, attitude, or actions and why they were inappropriate. Individuals suffering from subconscious or unconscious bias are generally unaware that their actions may be negatively impacting others. Explaining why behaviors are offensive clears miscommunication and misunderstanding on the topic and provides individuals with a learning experience of why what they said or did was wrong.
4. Know Available Resources
In working for self-advocacy, it is most crucial for individuals to know all available resources. These resources are great tools for planning and learning to navigate while balancing different factors in a new situation.
Overall, it is important for individuals to practice self-advocacy in calculated measures. Weighing impacts of group impressions, professionalism and relationship building heavily impacts the approach individuals should take. Although a delicate subject, there are no improvements in individuals' behavior if they are not corrected. Self-advocacy is a crucial tool to promote self-independence, growth, empowerment, and fair-treatment.